Cooking à la CPU

Its' summer. And, boy, is it hot! Have you ever thought that your PC was was hot enough to fry an egg on when you heard the fan spin up? Well, it is.

This feature comes straight from Japan courtesy of Captain Taremi. Enjoy!




Want some steak to go with your eggs? Not a problem!

Homemade Rabbit Poop-Powered Flamethrower!

We’re all for reusing and repurposing over here at GUO, and if we can light up the sky doing so… Well, so much the better!

In the beginning, there was the Poop Tank. Today, there’s the flaming poopthrower. National Geographic went out to film Nick as he constructed his latest experiment in home defense. The video below covers everything from concept to explosive result.

*Warning: Video contains mild use of profanity. And crazy people.

Attack of The Giant Toliets-The Sims 4

       The Sims 4, the newest game released by Electronic Arts to continue the Sims saga is something people having been looking forward to for awhile, but this glitch in the game is one of the greatest I have seen and it makes me want to buy this iconic game. Somehow, PC Gamer writer Tom Mark, found out how to take common items like bookcases and TV or toilets and make them into giant pieces of art! He shows what its like to have a town of mutant toilets and how it over runs the sims into the apocalypse or creating the lovable smurfs as tall as the Empire State Building so they can crush Gargamel once and for all! Now this is what people mean by letting your imagination go wild! See the wonderfulness!

You can get The Sims 4 today!

ALS Ice Bucket Challenge Hits the World of Video Games

The strange viral phenomenon of posting videos of yourself dumping a bucket of ice water over your head to spread awareness of ALS (Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, formerly known as Lou Gehrig’s disease) has stretched beyond the realms of reality and into the worlds of our favorite digital playthings.
GUO’s own Unpaid Intern spotted Warframe’s “greedy milk” Corpus baddies getting doused first.

Gearbox was quick to respond by offering up David Eddings, the IRL voice of the most annoying robot ever created, to the bucket.

Finally, Bungie took up the challenge, and cashed in on their own little viral in-joke, with That Bucket Came From the Moon.

I’m sure we can look forward to many more of our fantasy friends getting wet for this great cause in the weeks to come.

To date, the Ice Bucket Challenge has raised some $13 million in support of ALS. You can find out more or donate at ALSA.org.

Shinjuku Kabukicho Robot Restaurant | Weekend Watchlist

Have you ever wondered what a Medieval Times style dinner-n-show restaurant might look like in Japan? I bet you’re wondering about it now. Guess what? Your imagination sucks. It’s about to get seventeen different flavors of weird up in here!

Deep in the red-light district of Tokyo’s Shinjuku ward lies the not-so-humble dinner theater known simply as Robot Restaurant. And… Well, you just gotta see this.

Oh, and before we begin, I‘m not sure if ladies in bikinis driving power armor shaped like ladies in bikinis warrants a NSFW warning, but… Well, there you go.

Without further ado: Ladies! Tanks! Robots! Let’s go Robot Restaurant!

Now I don’t want to say that you haven’t seen anything yet because, well, you’ve probably already seen more crazy than one person should but… There’s more. A lot more. We haven’t even gotten to Cutie Honey Captain America and King Godzilla yet!  Oh yes, there will be Gangnam Style.

Mario Kart Mercedes DLC Spawns This Must See Japanese Commercial

Japanese Mario Kart 8 owners are in for a a little dose of advert-gaming when a free Mercedes GLA DLC drops later this year. Ya know what’s stranger than turning laps in a Mercedes against opponents in go-karts? This car commercial tie-in. Enjoy!

Goat Simulator Has "Bah" Its Way Into My Heart

BAH-BAH-BAH!!!

When it's pouring rain outside and your bored of torturing Kerbals from Kerbal Space Program, you decide to check out You Tube for a bit and see what's new in gaming. Little to my surprise I see a bunch of You Tubers with new videos all on Goat Simulator. At first I'm like, "What the heck? Goat Simulator? How is this going to be fun..." I spoke too soon...

Review: FTCE Flashcards (Android) – Um… Sorry, Words Can’t Describe the Horror

When yours truly is left without a catchy title to plug in, you know we’re going to some deep, dark places.

Welcome to the world for FTCE Flashcards, an Android app designed to help teachers study for the Florida Teacher Certification Examinations. Yep, we’re going to the top of the educational food chain today with a study aid designed to help those who make the kids study study. And if you think that sentence was awkward, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!

If a picture is worth a thousand words, this may be out longest review yet. Let us join the Mrs. on her photographic safari into the world of FTCE Flashcards as designed, created by, and sold from BH Inc, the folks behind Superflashcard.com!

Remember, you can click on any image to view a larger version or even right-click/save image to create desktop wallpapers to scare away literate folks.

First stop, Google Play where this app has 55 five-star reviews and two three-star reviews.

Robot and Lightning Shooting Tesla Coils Play the Theme to Pacific Rim

Okay, I’m working on a series of features to run all next week, but I need some more time to get ‘em all squared away. I’m a little rusty, my PC’s just been reloaded, The Mrs. is home on vacation, I don’t like working with people in the room, and this f*&(#ing cat won’t stop biting me. So, in the meantime, please welcome back ArcAttack to GUO and enjoy this video featuring an awesome robot and two lightning spitting tesla coils performing the theme to Guillermo del Toro’s homage to classic Japanese giant monster movies, Pacific Rim.

You Can No Longer Use iTunes to Build Nuclear and Biological Weapons. Really.

Apple has once again updated the end user license agreement (EULA) for iTunes. According to section (g) of the new rules, you can no longer apply your vast collection of music and movies toward the goal of creating nuclear, chemical, or biological weapons. Wait… What?!

“You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of nuclear, missiles, or chemical or biological weapons.”

Check it out for yourself at Apple.com

I guess it’s time to cancel my subscription to War Crimes Weekly Podcast…

Online Gaming Now Illegal in Florida

Since you wouldn’t believe me if I told ya, here’s Yahoo News (by way of HuffPo) with the scoop:

“Got a laptop or an iPhone in Florida? You could be violating the law.

In an attempt to ban Internet cafes in the Sunshine State, legislators may have been a bit too broad in their language, resulting in what some legal experts say is a law that inadvertently makes it illegal to own a computer or a smartphone.

The bill, which was signed into law by Florida governor Rick Scott in April, was meant to shut down cafes, some of which have been tied to illegal gambling in the state. And shut them down it did: over 1,000 cafes were immediately closed.

But it's the wording that's problematic, as it defines a slot machine as "any machine or device or system or network of devices" that can be used in games of chance. Turns out the Internet is full of gambling sites, which is where the definition runs into some problems.”

Get Your Cola REALLY Cold With Bottles Made of Ice

Coca-Cola is testing a new method of bottling its bubbly beverage in Colombia with bottles made out of ice. A silicone band keeps these frozen drink containers cooling your soda while saving your fingers from frostbite.

While these new ice bottles are being spun as being eco-friendly, critics (ie. crybabies who don’t know how to have fun) point out that the electricity costs needed to ensure the bottle remain solid until sold outweighs any ecological savings gained.

Scientists Discover Cthulhu and His Daughter Living in Termite Guts. No, Really!

Researchers at The University of British Columbia have discovered two new microscopic organisms that have taken up residence in the intestines of termites. These newly discovered little creatures measure a mere 10-20 microns long and are believed to help the bugs digest wood. Upon observing the octopus-like appearance and movements of these lil’ wood muchers, UBC researcher Erick James elected to name them Cthulhu macrofasciculumque and Cthylla microfasciculumque after the ancient alien gods featured in several early 20th century horror stories by H.P. Lovecraft.

The official research article featuring pictures and videos of the Great Old One and his daughter are now available on the international, open access research journal PLOS ONE.

Cthulhu fhtagn!

Twitter Controlled Cockroach is So Very Wrong

Think Java’s got bugs? You ain’t seen nothin’ yet!

Meet Twitter Roach, an evolution of the RoboRoach concept that adds an Arduino processor and WiFi antenna to allow you favorite creepy-crawly to take orders from random folks via Twitter messages. Strapping a tiny, techy backpack onto the roach, the system allows one order from the @TweetRoach account every thirty seconds to boss the bug around using hashtag commands such as "#TweetRoachLeft" and #TweetRoachRight". Upon receiving the order, the system “stimulates” the insect’s antennae to trick it into moving.

This bizarre project was created by Brittany Ransom and displayed at the Life, In Some Form art exhibition hosted by The Chicago Artists Coalition. Ransom justifies the project to CNet as science stating "At what point does its intelligence and ability take over? How much does it take before we are all desensitized to overstimulation? As we, as human beings, grow more cyborgian and interconnected through social media, this project helps us participate in discovering the answer."

Installation Disk? Windows Key? Nokia Windows Phone Error Confounds All

Johnny Ruokokoski was playing around with re-flashing the firmware on his Nokia Lumia 920 Windows Phone when he came across a most unexpected error message.

Yup, Johnny had managed to bugger up the NT kernel on his phone. Any tinkerer of Windows machines in familiar with this unfortunate happenstance. The kicker was the stock error message still buried in the phone OS from its days running on PCs. Appreciating the irony Johnny Tweeted this picture of the error. When another Twitter user forwarded the image to Windows Phone Support they promptly responded but declined to help as modifying your phone’s firmware immediately puts you in the 'Warrantee Voided’ category. Johnny responded with “and I didn't expect any support. but thanks for fast feedback, it shows how good WP support is, I like it :)”

Source: The Next Web

Deal! Cthulhu Christmas Calendar is Free for iOS Today

December is a maddening time of the year. You got the crazy shopping, insane decorating, nerve-racking family visits, and upsetting bankruptcy paperwork all crammed into a 31-day period were everyone is expected to be nice and love one another. In such mind rending times, why not commit to a quiet minute each morning with the original gods of madness, Cthulhu and Friends?

Cthulhu Christmas Calendar comes to us from Red Wasp Design, the folks behind the turn-based tactical iOS game Call of Cthulhu: The Wasted Land. In this new advent calendar app you’ll greet each new day with a shriek as Big C, Nyarlathotep, and all their crazy buddies greet you with adorably insane artwork and break your sanity with a bit of trivia from the H.P. Lovecraft created mythos. Best of all, this celebration of Christmas madness is free today!

Do some pointy-clicky over at iTunes and grab Cthulhu Christmas Calendar and Cthulhu Christmas Calendar HD today. You’d be mad not to!

Apple’s Steve Wozniak is Stabbin’ Suckas with Danny Trejo in Vengeance: Woz With A Coz

Well, this finally happened: Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak has taken to the “mean streets” to pump bad guys full of lead in his first video game appearance. Not bizarre enough? He’s teaming up with the terrifically terrifying giant Mexican movie man Danny Trejo (Desperado, From Dusk Till Dawn, Machete, and…er, Spy Kids) for the iOS video game tie-in to Trejo’s upcoming film, Vengeance.

In this 16-bit styled runner game, The Wizard of Woz must shoot, stab, slide, and jump his way through the many levels of Fusion City to recuse his wife, J-Woz, from the clutches of Ricardo White. Armed with his trusty translator app, Woz fully voices his own character with authentic Spanish exclamations upon death such as “Tortillas!” or “Chihuahua…” So… not only is one of the founding fathers of home computing now a violent video game character, but a racist one. Yay?

Vengeance: Woz with Cause boasts a storyline written by Steve himself, multiple upgradable weapons, secret crosses to find, big boss battles, and the ability to swap between Wozniak and Trejo during your revenge fueled murder spree across Fusion City.

Vengeance: Woz with Cause is $0.99 on iTunes.

Om Nom Nom and Eat Up… Your $50 iPhone Case?

Sick of Thanksgiving leftovers? Chow down on this rice cracker iPhone case!

Be it nuclear proliferation, natural disasters, Aztec calendars, broadband metering, or plain ol’ zombie apocalypse, mankind is constantly teetering on the brink of extinction. You need to be ever watchful for opportunities to secure food, water, and shelter at all times. Fortunately Mariko of ikiiki-ys.com has your back on the food securing front. Behold the “Survival Senbei iPhone 5 Case”!

Inspiration struck Mariko a month ago. Being a senbei (Japanese rice cracker) artist, Mariko longed for a way to make the tasty snack hip again rather than allowing it to languish under the stigma of being “old people food”. Her solution? This lovingly handcrafted iPhone 5 case. Perfect for the hip, happening, and all too used to paying through the nose for accessories!

Sadly, the Survival Senbei iPhone 5 Case isn’t so great at actually protecting your pocket pal. The website is very upfront with customers about the likelihood of this tasty case breaking in a variety of circumstances such as:

・Before arrival: 9%
・Affixing to iPhone 5: 76%
・Using touch screen: 18%
・Touched by friend: 81%
・Turning up the volume: 50%
・Connecting to PC: 54%
・When the user is upset or annoyed: 65%
・Putting in pocket: 89%
・When dropped: 120%

None the less, Mariko states the probability of the Survival Senbei iPhone 5 Case being delicious is 100% and great for protecting you from the munchies. Seeing as how honest they are about durability, I can’t imagine their yumminess chances being wrong.

You can order the Survival Senbei iPhone 5 Case direct from Mariko at ikiiki-ys.com for 3,818 yen (that’s almost $47 US!), but be prepared for a wait. Every case is handmade by Mariko herself and she’s only cranking out three a day. Delivery times are already running over a month.

For American Thanksgiving, GUO Presents A Quad-Rotor Turkey That Drops Pumpkin Pie

Utah Aerials cobbled together coat hangers, zip ties, poster board, and a remote controlled quad-copter to create this homemade, dessert laden UAV. So…^^title^^. Happy Thanksgiving!

Only Have Eyes for Hello Kitty with H. Kit Contact Lenses

Eye yay yay! Do you only have eyes for Sanrio’s merch maiden Hello Kitty? Maybe you’d like more Hello Kitty in your eyes! Yessir, H. Kit fans can finally proclaim their love for all things cute and Kitty at a glance with a colorful collection of Kitty faces ringing their eyes.

These non-prescription, vanity lenses are available now at sales outlets (such as Solution Lens for $19.90 a pair) in a variety of colors. But really, if you’re committed to this, pink is the only option you need.